what exactly have we gained from this market takeover of planet earth?

days tick on

summer days full of heat and brooding skies.

rain a distant sense of something that once fell and may again …..

the forest settles into its summerself with baby wallabies big enough to leave mum hanging about the house nibbling and scooting off quick when we appear,

older ones lazily stop mid chew and watch us

all a bit ho hum really.

the swallows after two nestings have all flown leaving the verandah scatter shot like a jackson pollock in black and white.

the white browed scrubwren that nested in the narnia lantern at the  back door which it crammed full of leaves and bark has gone and because we were away there were no sightings to be had.

red belly black snakes warmed up are on the go and hunt frogs around the  tank and garden.

at night christmas beetles fly into the bedroom – drawn by the light their noisy vibration and clunky flight deposits them in my lap,

I pick them up beautiful in their burnished bronze pink and green bodies and return them to the outdoors.

there is sufficient anecdotal evidence to suggest that these scarabs are in decline – everywhere are signs serving to dish up unpalatable truths.


a chorus of cicadas sounded the other day and then they stopped not to be heard again – still we do not know why some summers they emerge in great numbers and other years they are a minor note in the forest orchestra.

I do remember summers past when their call has been so loud so all-consuming that all other birdsong is drowned out and the reverberation of their call has rattled around inside my head – uncomfortably so.

that they can tell us things about seasons and changes is obvious but what…

turtles are basking on logs exposed by the drop in dam levels – big ones small ones – once they scarpered back into the water when we passed by – these days they lie still in the heated landscape.

tho the summer is drier then previous years all is well at the faerie embassy.

the little king and his family have left the forest for a more surburban existence – an inside toilet a laundry even – electricity  flyscreens and tap water so filled with chemical additives that drinking it is a toxic hazard.

lets face it not all is rosy under the civilised progressive march of capitalism.

one might ask what has worked?

what has served us ?

what exactly have we gained from this market takeover of planet earth?

we are in debt – deep deep debt with our water our air our soil AND our humanity .

tell me we are not dishonoured  when we lock refugees up on islands and throw away the key,

tell me we are not compromised when we fluoridate our water supply and consume crazy like in a world where plastic bags make islands and infiltrate the bodies of fishes.

there is the physical and then there is the meta physical.

everytime we deal less than with each other, with forest and river and kangaroo and fish, we diminish our selves, our spirit, our heart – the heart of who we are or who we could be .

for every building built every town created every sewerage system made every car computer mobile manufactured there is a cost and that cost is bearing down upon us zooming so quickly into our senses that our  attempts to zone off or out are failing.

the horror , the real truth of our relationship with planet earth can no longer be ignored.


this is 2017 and the proverbial is hitting the fan and  flinging it around so that we are all spattered with it.

my moon calendar says be kind

my heart says be still

my spirit says be creative

and my mind says stay open.

what to do?

take a walk on the wild side

move stealthily over the rocks

listen to the roar of the waterfall

feel the spray tap tap against your cheeks.

some wild still exists and where it does

drink deeply and gratefully

dream its existence again and again into every cell of your body

and give thanks

and again I say

give thanks.



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womb wise


The womb ;

container of life

and all the mysteries

receives communication direct from the source.

The womb is the dreamer

the basket that sustains life.

it is sustainability

it is permaculture .



The womb is sterile and empty

full and complete.

The womb knows all that was

and all that can be.

the womb  communicates deep knowing.



The womb does not analyse or dissect,

disseminate prevaricate or arbitrate.


in a world of rationality and logic

a world of the dogma of academia and titles

the womb has been given no place.

it is not considered, honoured or heard,

it is relegated to a functional part of the female anatomy

and one that we can certainly do without they say.


the womb is solely for procreation

its menses controlled , its ova owned

and is removed when it reaches its use by date.

it is associated with irrationality, hysteria ,madness and disease

a problem identified by the monthly flow

a place of inept engineering

and the incubator in the laboratory is taking over.


and yet,

this place of power, this source of creation

cannot be lived without,

cannot be exchanged

and will not be silent.


The womb will be heard,

hears all

and grows weary of the endless march through boy’s town.

Some female carriers march the corridors of waste and stupidity

in an attempt to communicate and change the world.

Study hard at the boys institutions

get a title after your name they were told

learn the male language of analysis logic and no heart

then and only then  you may sit in the offices of corruption

and talk the talk while your heels do the walk.


The womb is over this play

and slicing  thru the fog of slavery

it  reclaims the wombmindheartspirit.

It calls  time to sing and dance the tapestry of knowing

emanating enfolding and embracing all.

this can be felt but cannot be languaged.


Some of the  boys grow up and become men

take off their strait jacket strangled tie of compliance

their shoes and socks

and leave the corridors of hypocrisy.

They return unto themselves

locate their children the mother the tribe the planet the cosmos

and give thanks,

for  finally they hear the song of creation

that is quietly but sturdily sung thru out all of life.


The womb wise song weaves a web of deep love and connection

dancing the feminine and masculine

as two divine complementary energies

sharing their wisdom

to uphold the sanctity of life on earth

for the benefit of all beings.

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But I will keep voting for the rivers


It is election time on this fair land and the campaign trail marches into our kitchen before the sun.

Only a month to the winter solstice and the sun is taking its sweet time to rise above the tree line and bring its light into the kitchen.

And when it finally does turn up we know our time with it is very short.

Hence me taking full advantage this morning on the east verandah basking in the warmth listening to the chorus of aahhs rising and falling from a mob of ravens.

Autumn does as it likes to do introduces cold winds and shorter days while still flirting with summer.

The day before yesterday I swam in the ocean at Bermi -deliciously warm deliciously salty and marveled that in mid may the sea could be so warm.

But like the recent debate between our potential leaders let us ignore any talk about the climate.


The politicians vie with each other in untruths making promises and avoiding anything resembling common sense and humanity.

Of course acting like the toady nation we appear to resemble we also hear way too much about the campaign trail in the US where trump stirs the cauldron of hatred and divisiveness.

Beside me the eastern spinebill and the lewins honeyeaters plunge into the tank washing themselves -flying back up to a branch flicking and fluffing up their feathers  and singing in the sunlight.

scrub wrens and superb blue wrens hop about my feet and alight on the table picking up crumbs.

Well I am in excellent company because they do not vote either.

It is true , I do not vote. I cannot defend this position and nor do I need another lecture. what I will do is offer you a story instead that led me to this point many years ago.
Once upon a time there was a great Being that sacrificed all for the beings that She held in her lap. Over and beyond forever and a day She gave and gave and gave. During a particularly violent and destructive never ending season it became clear that everything was in a spot of bother and still She kept on giving.

Water and Air were running out, Elephant and Polar Bear were suffering and already many many beings had left.

Only glimpses remained.

Meetings were held and discussions were had by humans that believed they were top of the chain having supreme rights to everything. They had systems in place and the power to fix anything or so they thought.

If you vote for me I will make it better.

no me… no me… no me… no ME….

but really they all acted the same , serving their own interests and filling their pockets with things they could not eat.

The forests declined, the creatures declined.

The quality of life for all declined and so it was that we arrived at the man made 21st century and all was not as well as it could be.


What if we abandoned this system of trumpism and nominations and blather about democracy and bad guys and weapons and poisons and bad guys and money and jobs and progress and bad guys and what IF..,

Well generally I am not much of a fan of the  ‘what if ‘ story so I entered upon my own solution which is hardly original but gave me somewhere to begin – a focus that  along the way has brought me closer and closer to nature…

run for the hills and live in a beautiful place surrounded by the gentle creatures of the forest

pay attention to their songs.

pay attention to the passing of clouds and the angles of the sun upon the solar panels and is there enough power to turn on the computer?

pay attention to the rain and is there enough water for a bath?

pay attention to the trees that bend and sway and hold the nests so very very far above the ground.

build a toilet out of doors and allow the human waste to compost until one  day you open the hatch at the back and dig out humus and sprinkle it around the garden.

It has been a journey and it continues on …

but what else can I do

what else can I Be  that serves this great Being that gives all and asks for so little in return?

I can sing to her I can dance for her I can cry for her.

I can nourish her hopes and respect her fears.

She is me after all.

In all honesty when I came right into the nitty gritty of earth and star and scrub wren I couldn’t I won’t I cannot …vote for a politician – a self serving dishonourable totally out of touch with heart and spirit and loving kindness.  more importantly I refuse to vote for a self serving dishonourable totally out of touch with heart and spirit system.


I will keep voting for the River and her wild leap over rocks and waves that lap on sandy shores.

I will vote for wombat that it might amble thru the dark of night stopping and pondering as it does.

I will vote for the wild creative joyous spirit of humanity to rise up and crack open the hearts of all politicians of all peoples.

And one day we might blink and look around and think wow there are no bad guys there are no walls we have to build

there are no missiles we have to fire

there are no mines we need to dig.

One day in this my utopian vision we might join with this great Being called Earth

and …….

I do not know the end to this story.

It is a story after all, but then that is the fabric of reality is it not?

we Dream and then it manifests.

So if I keep telling you and you keep telling me the stories

of the beauty and the mystery ,

the stories of feather and egg  and mist and frost and worm…

Who knows…

who knows what could possibly

BE .


P.S.       well I got that off my chest or where ever it was sitting some time ago  and moving on would like to mention that I am a bit of a  big fan of the greens as a group of people masquerading as a political party for their generally common decency and respect for the earth and all beings.






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the innocent heart




there are those that rule that write the laws and administer them while others find themselves on a proscribed list.

asylum seekers are refugees fleeing persecution danger horror and terror. they come to our shores knocking asking pleading for assistance and find themselves banished to rot on other islands.

probably they were hanging out the washing one day and a rocket demolished their street so they picked up the kids and ran and ran and ran searching for a safe haven.


every day Kingston inquires into the world around him and so far this uncomfortable fact has not yet leached into his life.


Kingston sits in his car seat looking out the window watching the worlds appear in front of him.


there is plover nesting right beside the road again. why do they do that mummy he asks, will they be ok?

there is wallaby and kangaroo – the females heavy with pouch – a leg sticking out a head bending down to nibble. they stare at the car swivel their ears turn their head . sometimes they will with consummate grace bound away, other times they watch his small face pressed up against the glass. did you see that leap over the fence daddy? I wish I could do that.


there are the young bandit calves standing in the middle of the track holding the car up again – one with a white patch over its eye and one with clouds painted on its back.

the young recognize each other and they invite Kingston to a race and off they go – their legs kicking awkwardly up in the air, head bucking an bouncing , so gawky and having a ton of fun. Kingston laughs delightedly and waves them goodbye.


the wedge tail eagle slides into view drawing lazy circles in the sky – a pair of them gliding rising and falling.

in an instant the eagle spears to a paddock plucking a bunny up in mighty talons and sweeping it off its feet.

a gulp a heartfelt sigh for the bunny and awe for the majesty of the moment witnessed.


the child tries vainly to hold all things being equal and yet some must eat others – it is the nature of it and difficult to grasp in the innocent heart.


and there is fox -a golden red creature that races fleet footed like the wind across the countryside. three young kit foxes disturbed early one morning near a dam running for cover and in the weeks and months ahead gradually identities emerged and fearless was so named.

there he is dad there is fearless – tail flared out in the wind stopping and turning, alert eyes seeing past the window into the heart of a small boy.

the fox – interloper scavenger vermin killer of lambs and chickens is hunted baited trapped and flung aside by the great human army.


kingston doesn’t know any of this protected by his innocence and capacity to love all beings equally.



we humans have a righteousness which in turn creates the ‘other’. By proclaiming something other we in turn fear it and vilify it.

introduced species are front runners for proscription – once on the list they have to go and in liberal amounts poison is laid the gun is loaded the trap is set.


in the late light of day there is bunny bobtail racing across the grasses and tussocks, whiskers twitching, scampering across the road in front of the car,bobbing down a burrow running for its very life – hunted and persecuted by trap bait gun and virus it clings on to existence alongside us.


the thing about creating ‘other ‘ is how much more powerful it becomes, how much it is demonised and how much truth is bent out of shape.


the fox the rabbit the blackberry the willow did not seek to come to this land. they did not choose to be placed on the proscribed list. they were brought over in the pockets of the colonial barons who wished to make this land into what they had left behind.


there was no recognition of the indigenous way of living here- no acknowledgement of their agricultural practices, their villages their methods of conservation , food preparation medicines or cultural knowledge. no notice taken of the songs the dances the ceremonies- no notice at all of the effort they employed to maintain vitality of land river and tribe. they became ‘other’ and were systemically disempowered by the gun the church and the law. into the background of the white colonial fantasy they disappeared .


coming into the valley there are camels- the knobbly kneed beasts carrying their water supply come from a land of desert winds and sand dunes of hot sun and clear broad skies .their thick rubbery lips chewing – spittle flying and Kingston laughs to see this creature step out of the pages of ali baba and the 40 thieves .


sometimes on a late night and a little boy does not have many of them a wombat is sighted right at the time when the owl and tawny frogmouth are swooping silently thru the forest selecting their dinner. wombat is standing still pondering dreaming having a scratch a nibble of grass ambling about its busy ness.


back home spring has brought the skinks out to play and kingston breaks off a bit of biscuit and offers it to them -they have had a long sleep and are hungry he tells us.


Kingston lives in a world with so many Beings jostling for survival at a time when our very existence on the planet is looking decidedly shaky.


perhaps instead of our assumed colonial superiority we could learn humility.

perhaps we could advertise tolerance and sharing as a means of accommodating the biodiversity still tenuously hanging on.

perhaps we could look around and feel the beauty in all things.

And then we might ask – who are we without the eagle without the fox without the platypus?

who are we without love without family without community?

and what do we become when we persecute other?

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I came here to play



I have been very slack and ignoring you all and today out of the blue I turn up here and find some beautiful comments from friends old and new. I felt a little like returning but do not know yet If I am ready.

I am shamed to have been caught out napping and yet having said that it is my time to be…  to be quiet and still …to lay on the earth and breathe and  muse along with wisps of clouds and eagles circling spiraling riding /writing their story in the blue …their  journey their dance.

and as always there are many stories to share of forest life in the autumntime  richer and deeper and funnier and sadder and sillier and

But for now and for Bridie who has asked  here is a revisiting :

(it is not a new one , indeed it was written many years ago and perhaps I would say it all differently … but … it has its voice  and so …)


I came here to play

with You


with You


against seeming odds

of  regimes controlling all facets of existence,

and beneath the threat of war and chaos,

while battling depleted exhausted and contaminated resources

AND burdened by great suffering.

despite all this,

I came here to play

with You          ...           Mother

with Earth and Heart and Spirit…

I came here to play…


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this never before seen heard or felt day


barely dawn

not even a chirrup.

I hear the murmur of voices and then a door closing

a car starting and the high pitch of a small child calling out from the verandah

‘love youu   love youuu     love youuuu

as he waves off his mother now midwife

who works in a hospital a long drive from here.




I snuggle back in and hope he does too.

I resist wakefulness and turn back to the dream world

seeking glimmers of my nighttime journeys.

the door opens, a small shape enters barely visible in the half light

and climbs up onto the bed pressing firmly against me.

and then rather loudly for the hour I thought,

‘soooo  granddad is up making tea and toast for us in bed’

he says with a certain amount of satisfaction in his voice.

mmmm … I inhale the divine radiance of innocence and adventures yet to be had.

I know how lucky I am to be here


in this moment.

this day this new day

this never before seen heard or felt day.




the sky is milky and the forest a huddle of dark shapes against it.

first one chip-choo-chippychoo and then a long while later others begin-

a whistle… pip pip… twee twee ..some laughter and

melodies that rise out of the silence to fill the spaces inbetween.

small shapes flit across the verandah from stem to shrub to flower to post.


And this is why I am here

to be present for this beauty

this magnificence

this Song of Life.




the other morning I got out of bed and discovered a dead kingfisher on the verandah.

looked to me like it had bonked itself out hitting the window.

this happens a bit and sometimes we can pick them up

hold them to our hearts and they will recover to go on and sing the tale.

too late for this little fella.

and what an outfit with its rich royal blueness on head and back

perfectly set off by an orange breast.

little cream flashes below the ear and a long deadly beak complete the lush look.


I pop it in a box so I can show the wee king when he gets home from school.

he strokes its softness crooning ‘I’m sorry you died’

and off we go to bury it under the lemon verbena.

‘we need something to remember,’  he says and his hands make a cross.

well where on earth did he learn that I wonder?

so we gather two bits of wood from his scrap pile and a rubber band,

‘write on it’ grandma

so I write kingfisher buried here .




And this is who I am

a  dweller inside these tiny moments

these tiny no things

these little capsules of Life going about its busyness.




whispering clouds have come to the day

unfurling their fine spinners thread across the blue blue canvas.

they are unhurried and speak of events yet to happen.

I see wind coming and wings lifting

I see arrows and feathers fanned out like fine lace.

a soft breeze coats my face and bare limbs.

a white butterfly rises and dips about the crimson buddleia.

the air now holds the thickness of summer noon

an indolent heat stretching forever

into the joy  of the seasons harvest.

our hands sticky with juice – apple pear peach plum -running over our chins

as we take  a break from writing

from sitting at the round table

where our pens have been carving warrior words of radical thoughts and creative spells.

a web being designed now

with kindness and passion

with humility and courage.

one stitch at a time I weave into the spell of harmony

one stitch in time saves nine my mother always said.

same thing really.

the circle is open not unbroken

and while tattered fragmented thoughts of an old order demand attention

we resist the urge to grab them.



I am a card player.

I am a mystic.

I am a mountain home.

I am the hand that weaves and the heart that sings.

it is my time

it is your time.

it is timeless and unknown.




each cloud each wisp each birdsong tells a story

that squirms into my cells strengthening my resolve.

the kingfisher died and I remember that this form I hold will also pass.

And so while I am here

I will hang about in the tiny moments of Life living


in the little graces offered

by cloud and butterfly ,

in the wee utterances

of  bird and child.


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a new moon




so much rain again this summer

places an autumn air upon our mornings where mist and her attendants swirl around the hills dancing until after breakfast.

the valley shines emerald

and here in the forest we wrestle leeches off us everytime we step off the verandah.

goannas large and small harass our hens and like to commandeer the one egg we are almost getting every day. we cant buy eggs with a yolk colour like ours even when we source them free range from the neighbours down the road.

our three girls do enjoy a diet rich in wild greens, invertebrates and kitchen scraps and we thank them for adding that richness to our diet.



my bedroom verandah on the north west corner of the house has become a shortcut for creatures to use such is the wild growth all around us.

why fight your way thru that jungle when you can step onto the boards beside the bank of batteries and meander across exiting down a couple of steps near the paper maiche room?

in the night possums take time out from galloping along our iron roof to shimmy down a pole and muck up outside our bedroom. they have  so enjoyed the grapes this season.

wallaby and wombat make use of it  and if we forget to shut the hens in at night they will make a beeline for our verandah and cackle loudly until one or other of us blearily hunts them off.

early dawn also sees the swamp wallaby sitting on the verandah eating the leaves of the pink salvia.

quite a highway out there – just waiting for one of us to trip over someone when we go out for our nocturnal visits.

a rasping scratching sound on the boards had me looking out the window just now to see goanna has also cottoned on to this pathway.  I think it has fled hassling the hens because John went after it with the rake.

I got up and pulled the door shut so it wouldn’t get any ideas of joining me

perhaps I am mistaken but it does seem as if they are all very interested in what goes on this side of the glass and mudbrick walls. or maybe they are trying to find ways to avoid the leeches and the ticks.

we made a scoot for the kitchen door the other afternoon when Jess saw red belly black snake sidling along behind stanleys stove wood and I managed  to close it closed before it could take a slide  thru the fly screen  and investigate.

on two separate occasions we have had a red belly check out our pantry/kitchen and then there was the rather large  goanna that could not find its way out the door out of our lounge room for simply ages.

suffice to say the forest is in awesome form – wildly chaotic and flourishing pushing fungi thru in any number of places…

dams are full and frogs are plentiful

turtles have had a great breeding season and wallaby babies poke heads out of every pouch.



indeed this spring/summer has been the season of the baby

and we have been blessed to welcome two new beings into our family

two girls born to two sisters

will they be warriors like me? queries Kingston John who has an obsession with warriors star wars and lego.

he insists on warrior training with his dad carrying shield and wooden sword and both return sporting bruises,

obviously no quarter is given.

of course they will be earth warriors we tell him just like you but right now it is milky breasts and cuddles that they want .

the miracle of new life

of attending to the journey of nurturing a tiny being.

possibly one of the most awesome tasks we ever undertake and yet a career is deemed more valid.

the twenty four /seven sacrifice of parents with a baby lies unseen beneath the text of lives.

all of us have sprung from a womb some of us suckled and some of us were deeply loved .

not really something one thinks about as life takes us on into the next stage and the next and the next 

and then as a grandparent it all gets revisited  

and I observe  the girls doing it differently.

I become  privy to discussions about parenting ( oh how I went ‘wrong’) and learning new terms like ‘co- sleeping’ and ‘supervised tummy time’ and and .. ‘lactation consultants.’


all a bit heady for me.

I am not sure how I did it but I ended up with healthy adult children despite ticking most of the no-no boxes.



the wee king has started school-

a steiner school with soft curves, grace and gentle harmonics splashed with colours of the rainbow and cubbies in the yard with chooks and veges and songs

rooted in the notion that the child is a spiritual being.

sort of wets my eyes to take him there and reinforces that change is possible when I contemplate my start at the age of five.

sobbing … in a long corridor without end and being yanked  off my mother and shoved  into a classroom where I was scared and nervous for the rest of my school days.

one early memory involves being made to stand in front of the class

– hold out your hand – and then wacked several times with a ruler because I had done the ‘wrong’ page of arithmetic for homework.

I thought I was five but others in the family insist I was six.

oh well thats alright then isn’t it?

and then at ten I was made to sit outside a classroom again that long austere corridor because I refused to take my cardy off when the teacher told me to.

yes always rebellious – never did like to be told what to do.

eventually got carted off to the principals for a chat where by virtue of being a girl I avoided the strap.

And so when goanna and wombat and wallaby like to make my verandah a short cut I secretly applaud them,  I admire their I’ll do it my way style and I absolutely wish for all creatures the right to Be 


the right to Be themselves.



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